The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
i need some magic done to my vagina
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Randomize
