Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
