Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
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