Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
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