Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
