im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
