I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
