then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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