If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
