i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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