Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
