Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
