She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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