I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
