Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Randomize
