we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
