you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize