Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
