Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Dicks are not precious.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
