god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
