I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
