i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize