i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
