Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
you traded sex for a burrito?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
