Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
