All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
oh god the rape fog is back!
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
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