I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
