Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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