you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize