Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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