Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
