Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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