Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
