I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Randomize
