Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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