i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
