Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
