GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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