you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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