In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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