I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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