One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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