I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
