this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
