is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize