you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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