my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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