she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
