There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize
