he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
