Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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